The exquisite beauty of my face
is the first thing they saw.
Until they moved closer.
That’s when the sadness,
In my eyes became lucid.
They believed my skies
were all grey.
But they didn’t know.
Grey is a colour too.
A little bit of black
mixed with a lot of white.
Just how Life should be.
Some truth and some lies,
Which were mine to keep.
For its how we actually are
And yet it is the grey skies I told them
that bring rain
That’s how your garden flourishes
That’s when you see the rainbow…..
Never stop fighting until you arrive at your destined place – that is, the unique you. Have an aim in life, continuously acquire knowledge, work hard, and have perseverance to realise the great life. A. P. J. Abdul Kalam
I came across this quote and it left me wondering; do we really have to fight for what we want?
I used to think that whatever is meant for us will eventually gravitate towards us, just like birds who find a way back to their nests once the sun sets.
Have you ever had a feeling or wanting something so bad that you can’t stop thinking about it?
Is it okay to want something so desperately that you can actually feel your heart aching for it?
Maybe yes, it might even be a good thing if you ask me.
If you wake up thinking about something and if by the time you sleep, those thoughts haven’t ceased but rather only intensified then you must definitely ace up your act and fight for it.
There is a reason you can’t let go of them. Maybe those thoughts are your inner feelings, your gut instinct telling you to go out there and achieve those goals, or get that better job, or learn that new skill, or live the life you always dreamed of.
Maybe all the struggles you are facing and all the sacrifices you have made are actually preparing you to move ahead with confidence.
I have had my bad days and my sad days. I mean who doesn’t.
But I can 100% say that I have a resilient heart. I don’t give up easily. I fight for what I want. It might drain out the life of me to give up on something or someone, especially if that thing or person means so much to me.
I may back down a little bit but only so that my soul could align with the universe to lift me up higher.
I always have this insatiable urge to learn, to try out new things. It’s never been about making tonnes of money, but rather of a personal, emotional, and spiritual growth.
Which is why, I can’t just throw away all the effort, hard work, those thousands of hours of deep thinking and the time I put into it.
I keep fighting for what I want until I can’t fight anymore, until giving up is the only option left.
And even after that, I fight some more. I just can’t let go.
I always believed that before giving up, one should think about how far they have come.
Not only does success require diligent effort, it also requires persistence and patience.
Learn not to get side-tracked by fear. Or distracted by other’s opinions. Or closed minded by what ifs?
Rest when you are tired, but don’t quit.
There is no soul mate, or a life partner, or a friend out there who will solve all your worries.
You are the one, who you should be standing up for.
Regret is such a wasteful emotion. Time really flies. And you will only regret all the things you did not do, is when you are lying on your deathbed.
Don’t wait for tomorrow as tomorrow isn’t promised.
Do what you want to do today. It is the only time worth fighting for.
It’s the only time that matters.
A simple, yet profound statement. But the question is Do We?
The Buddhists have known for years that gratitude has been scientifically proven to strengthen your immune system and make you happier and more optimistic.
Human nature is to want what we don’t have and to dwell on the negatives—instead of celebrating what we do have and focusing on what’s going well.
I am guilty too of the same for a while now. Being a naturally free spirited person, I am uncomfortable with any kind of bondage that traps my mind, body and soul. My soul just starts rejecting it. So it is a battle of wits between what I want and what I have.
But sometimes circumstances in your life bring you to a point where despite your best efforts things are not as happening as you would like them to be.
Of late there have been some situations at home which have been draining me completely of all energy and positivity. It has left me exhausted and completely in a rotten mood. I am blaming not only the circumstances but also the other people in my life to an extent.
And recently all the pent up frustration was lashed out to my son who was on a long distance phone call.
On the other side he was bearing the brunt of my vile vomit of words. Not saying a word, he listened.
I went on and on for about 15 minutes till he found a pause in my words and then he spoke, as gently and calmly, as he naturally is.
His words not honey coated but real. Understanding me and making me understand.
Once the poison left my body I apologized to him, for bearing with an overly emotional mother and for saying things to him which he wasn’t even responsible for.
“I am so so sorry” I texted, again and again.
And he texted back, “its better the poison was thrown towards me, rather than anyone else, I know it wasn’t meant for me so it did not affect me, but I am glad it is out of your system”.
And every day, after that dreadful conversation, looking back, I wonder how your children suddenly become so mature enough that they take on the role of your protector.
And then you have your entire life pass by before your eyes, and all the teachings, and life lessons you taught your kids come back to you in multitude ways.
You are in awe of the universe and grateful to have such blessed souls around you to take care of you and remind you of things which you may have forgotten but they remember.
My point here is this. It can be easy to get swept away in the fast lane and forget to stop and show your appreciation for what you do have.
Gratitude doesn’t have to be saved for the “big” things in life. Being grateful everyday for waking up healthy, for having food on the table and clean home and clothes on your back is equally important. Gratitude is your partner understanding your moods.
Gratitude is not only about being thankful for positive experiences. In fact, sometimes thinking about negative or difficult situations can help to really nail down what you have to be thankful for.
Gratitude is being very very thankful for those handful people in your life who find it a blessing to have you in theirs.
Gratitude is to give back to others what they lack. Volunteering for the purpose of helping others increases our own well-being, and thus our ability to have more gratitude.
With so many bad things happening around the world, if you can find just one moment in your life that you are grateful about, then enjoy it and…….
Count your blessings!
As you get older, you gain perspective from the rear view mirror of your life.
There is something about aging that both men and women become more accepting of others and themselves.
This is especially true for women in the age group 50-70. They are less concerned about the opinion of others and are more determined to live life on their own terms.
There have been quite a few women who I have known since they were in their twenties and are now aging gracefully.
I guess it has more to do that after spending pretty much a lot of their youth on tending to their marriage, home and kids and they have more of “me” time as they get older. And with that “me” time comes a lot of satisfactory revelations, every now and then on how they would have lived differently if given another chance.
In fact come to think about it, these would have been the same things I would have changed, given the chance.
“I wish I hadn’t bowed to the family pressure to get married”.
“I know for a fact that if I had to relive those days gone by I wish I would have stopped being so afraid and taken more risks with regards to having a career. I could have juggled my time , got out of my comfort zone and held on to the needs of my own as against bowing to the needs of others first”.
“I wish I would have had a home to call my own rather than living with my in laws”.
“I wish I would have I’d trust myself and my talents more”.
“I wish I would have spent more time with my children”.
“I wish my partner understood me and my needs more”.
“I wish I would have looked after my health and endorsed a well regimented exercise program”.
“I wish I would have spent more time with my friends”.
“I wish I hadn’t allowed other people’s fears/ignorance to affect me so deeply that I would blunt my ambitions/dreams to please them”.
“I wish I would have the guts to say no and mean it”.
“I wish I would have taken up formal lessons in Dancing. I think it is the most liberating form of self expression”.
“I wish I would breathe, before I react and understand that I don’t have to have an opinion on everything”.
“I wish I could just pause and see life from a new lens”.
A lot of wisdom and comfort comes with time. Sometimes, the answer is just time — enough time to outlive the struggles in your 20’s and 30’s so that you can develop the mettle to balance the challenges that come in your 50’s and beyond.
There will be many times when you will need more than advice to overcome personal struggles. “Embrace your age” and love who you are now. It is the key to a happy, healthy and positive aging.
Don’t bother about wanting to turn back the clock. Give yourself the gift of a well-lived life.
Live a simple and healthy life by incorporating a few lifestyle changes and habits.
Don’t forget to do the small often ignored things that will make you content.
You will live as much as been gifted to you. Just live in such a way that each day is a celebration of your life!